Episode 10
Retirement: A Blessing or a Curse?
- Video
- Stories
- Contribute
My husband and I used to fantasize about retiring to a small condo near the beach. The reality? My husband is retired but wishes he was working. I am working and giving retirement a second thought. It’s not a simple decision. What have you decided about this chapter of your life? Tell me your stories.
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Retirement: A Blessing or a Curse?
If only I could love my job I would not have chosen to retire! I am only 49, but it's more a blessing than a curse because I can now be my own person, focus on the more important things in life, relax and enjoy my hobbies! However, if I were to love my job as Judge Judy does, I would continue to work part-time and spend the rest of my time with my family and friends, and travel the world. Judge Judy, we will miss you when you retire! -
Retirement; A Blessing or a Curse
I retired in 2002, at the age of 54. My wife and I just came back from a 5 week trial for the kid that murdered my son. We live in Portland, OR. The trial was in Washington DC. First day back to work the owner fired me. He didn't like the idea that I had taken the time off work to go to the trial. I couldn't find a job, so I just retired. I am busier now than when I was working. I am a volunteer at a prison in Salem. I facilitate the only class of it's kind in the ODOC on empathy, forgiveness & reconciliation. I mentor guys coming out of prison. I am involved in my church. Involved with Volunteers Of America, Oregon Food Bank's Harvest Share. Running back and forth to northern CA. Taking care of my mother that is 91. Involved with motorcycle ministry. Some people might think of what I am doing is a Curse, I think of it as a Blessing. -
Older employees
Hello Judge Judy, I am a big fan and was born the same year as you. I love your shows and have only disagreed with a few of your judgements !! Being of the same generation, we have quite a lot in common mainly our work ethic and strong sense of justice. I have always worked and in my previous post with American Airlines, EU law dictated that on reaching age 65 retirement was compulsory. I was devastated but the following year the law changed and without much expectation I applied to Virgin Atlantic and was overwhelmed when I was accepted especially at my age and also that Virgin staff are mostly young and gorgeous ! However being with young people keeps me in touch with life in general and I love being with them. Of course the travel is nice and my family and especially my grandchildren benefit. I love my computer, i-pad and android mobile phone for keeping in touch with the world ..... Yes work is good for the mind and the body so I keep going.... not bad for a 70 yr old.... -
Couple imbalance regarding retirement
My dad retired at 52 years old. He was a gym teacher. He knew everybody in the small community he was in. His first years of retirement, he was going to the school where he was always welcome and engaging the children in some projects, like learning how to throw boomerangs that he had built. After 5 years, my Mom retired and got bored of living in a rural village. She put a lot of pressure on my dad to move in a city. They moved and my father is really unhappy in a city where he is not known and where he has no friends. He tells me that he feels useless. My mom seems to enjoy her retirement. -
Don't Retire!
I have been working from my home for the same physician for 34 years. I took care of my children and household at the same time yet, I have always found time to go out with friends. Growing up and living in Brooklyn, NY, I was always a people person, and a go-getter. My husband on the other hand, was not as sociable. My husband retired a few years ago and we moved to CT to be near the kids. I have found that people are not as friendly as New Yorkers. All my husband does is go from room to room watching TV or reading. Doesn't want to do anything but relax, as he says. Luckily I'm still working for the same physician. It keeps me from going stir crazy. CT is a place to retire if you want to be dormant. NY will give me back my social life, and I still wouldn't consider retirement unless my boss retires. As for now, no way. -
Retirement is what you make it
If you worked hard all of your life as a legal American citizen who has no major debts, committed no major crime then you should prosper in the Garden of Eden. As my Bubbah would say "Work hard, stay healthy and enjoy retirement". She knew what she's saying bless her soul. If you think you can retire easy by just watching Judge Judy then you've got a lot of fingers to count. "You may be older but I'm a lot smarter than you" Well what Judge Judy and Byrd teaches us tell the truth, learn from our elders and take the lessons of a good Jewish Mother then you will enjoy retirement. A gezunt af dein kop!(Health on Your Head) -
Retire and Start Home-Based Buiness
I live in Bosnia, am 45 years old and I am preparing for an early retirement (disability retirement) in couple of months. As for my home based business: I am an independent distributor of two American network marketing companies. I enjoy working on my PC and I earn 3x as much than I did on my job. Can't wait to get my retirement so I can travel around the world and enjoy other things in life. Don't make a tragedy of your retirement. This is the age of Internet, use it to make money from home. -
We are starting our story!
We have bought a home on the Oregon coast! I have been retired for about a year; it's my husband's turn in a few months. We like each other a lot; he's my best friend. He also likes doing his thing and I like doing mine. The only thing I really worry about is that we like doing things around the house like moving walls, putting in new tile floor, working in the yard, so we bought a house that needs work. I am hoping we haven't bitten off more than what we can do, because hiring someone to help would be a slap in the face for him! Life is a journey; I hope this is as good as all the others we have been on. We have been waiting a long time for just the two of us. We have a family we called a his, mine and ours. It was never just us. So I am hoping when are we are all done, we still like walking and holding hands..that he gives a kiss good night and still opens the car door! Wish us luck! Thanks. -
Never Retire!
We did so well with our savings that our home was paid off within five years of buying it, and my fully funded pension, combined with the low interest rates, made my retiring a really smart move; financially. At 51 it was the stupidest move in the world! My husband is lucky enough to have a job he loves, but wants to give it a few more years. I have started doing contract work, but find that I am either too driven or people are just really lazy nowadays. So, my husband has edited two stories that I’ve written and now I am working on those edits, but I’m still bored. I enjoy our vacations, but long for the absolute engagement and overwhelming feeling that I had prior to retirement. As I try different companies on for size the boredom is depressing, but I solider on. In time, the right fit will happen and knowing our luck, just as I find that right spot, he will be ready to retire and then end up as a solo while I work away as happy as he is today. -
Mixed signals???
First of all I have to tell you that I am an avid "Judge Judy" fan. It is rare that I miss a single show. Anyway the subject is retirement. My experience is this, I worked until I was 70 years old. But I really started to work when I was almost 42. My wonderful husband was a very deliquient husband so that left me with the care of three girls to care for as well as the house, cooking, and mainly all chores and the husband came home to eat and sleep. So after 21 years together we seperated. O'h the main subject retirement, I loved to work I loved the department and all the people I worked with. I was a medical secretary/receptionist for a Pittsburgh hospital. Along came a BIG corporation that took over my wonderful hospital and eliminated my job.I was devastated! That was in 2009 today I was accepted for a parttime job in the food service and I'm only 74 and don't have any stretch marks. That's the truth. -
Retirement
I haven't retired. I still do everything I ever did, just at a much slower pace. My husband has retired, twice. He retired from his first career and was home for a few weeks. Didn't like not having anywhere to go or anything driving him to get up mornings and went back to work. Not long after that he found another career he had an interest in. That lasted until the next retirement opportunity. He is currently back to working 30+ hours a week and still hasn't figured out how to retire. I love his company but welcome the days he works as well. -
First Steps During Retirement
I was babysitting for my beautiful granddaughter. She took her first steps all of a sudden on her own at my house. I grabbed my camera and wanted to film it for all to see. I only got her taking a couple of steps when the batteries went dead. I called my son and daughter-in-law very excited. When they picked her up, I was waiting for them at the door for her to walk to them. She would not walk to them or anywhere. She would only crawl. I believe this was a gift from God that only he wanted me to witness her first steps and not have them on film for anyone else to witness. -
Work as long as you can!
My husband is a lawyer and says retirement is not in his vocabulary. Thank Goodness! I, however retired a year ago and can't seem to find my 'mojo'. Crafts don't keep my busy enough. We travel, but even that doesn't keep me going. So, Judge Judy...keep up the good 'work'. As long as you can....that is my advice. -
Not for me...
I loved working, making money & spending it. Lots & lots of spending! Forced retirement has taken it all away: my enjoyment, happiness, love for helping others, and satisfaction of achievement. I've been retired for 5 years & still think of it as unemployed at the moment, checking out all the job posting daily & hoping the phone will ring with some money making opportunity. I'll never be retired, just not working for now. -
Retirement, the begining of the end..
I have worked just about all my life. My dad had me help him with his business at an early age around 5 yrs old. I then worked in other jobs until I was 63 yrs. old when I retired with C.P.O.D. Although, I thought the end was near, I could no longer do my job..and was forced to retire. At first I was so busy trying to improve my health, I was unable to enjoy it. NEXT came the boring period, going crazy with limitations on everything I did. NO picnic. All my life, I have seen people work and keep sucking in as much as they can, only to leave it to people who steal your money, or children who use it for the wrong purpose. Now I am in the period where it is good not to get up at 5am and work until 5pm. GOD gave me the opportunity to see that life has more than money that can make happy. Also many drop dead shortly or during working, or shortly after. Life is great now not working to make other people wealthy off your time and sweat while the profit from killing you. Do they care? NO NO -
Retirement
My husband and I are in our 80s and have done many things in our lifetime. My husband always did things connected with construction....first building houses or commercial buildings and then specialized in pouring walls, then built duplexes and managed them. I stayed home and supported what he did in many ways as well as raising 4 children....one of which was handicapped with Spina Bifida. Lately we live alone, have a garden to care for and preserving what comes from that including lots of jam from our fig tree. This in Michigan where fig trees aren't supposed to grow. My husband has to bury it every winter for it to survive. I really don't feel like we have ever retired. My advice is to just find something else to do with your time. -
Retirees Have a Life
The biggest problem I've faced is that everyone that's not retired thinks you do nothing all day - that you're just hanging on a hook waiting for their phone call to give your life some meaning. I hear a lot of "oh, your retired, so you have time to do this or that." I put in my time working for years so now I don't have to do what someone else wants me to do on their time line. I had to put up barriers so others weren't consuming my retirement and using it to supplement their lives. Retirees are an invisible generation in this country; there are no t.v. shows or movies aimed at this age group, no advertising or interest by the media. We just don't have any value to mainstream America. I start every morning with "what do I want to do today" and then I do it. I exercise, watch my diet and see a doctor only if I have to. Just remember to look forward and not backward and keep moving. -
Retirement! One of Life's Huge Question Marks!
I was terrified of retirement! I put it off until I was 66, and I could have retired with most of my benefits at age 57. I was a teacher with the Department of Defense Schools, and taught in Turkey, Germany, Ethiopia, Scotland and England. I loved it all... the kids, the adventure of living overseas... What a ride it was! And it lasted 39 years! When I retired, I had to give up my car, my house, my friends in the U.K. and move thousands of miles back to Omaha, Nebraska! It was a lot to face alone, so naturally, I was ...TERRIFIED! But I took the dive anyway. Well! I worried for nothing. Now four years later, I have made many nice friends, am settled with my little English cat in a pleasant neighborhood, and am involved with antique classes, oil painting, church, and lots of volunteering projects which I enjoy. I am 70 and don't ever plan to retire from 'retirement'. I'm too damn busy! -
Reinventing myself in retirement
I "retired" in January of 2011. It took me about a year to get used to it but am now reinventing myself to be the person I should have been when I was in my 20's... that is making a living from doing the things I love. It's win-win because I'm giving myself to the world whole- heartedly. -
Don't do it!
I retired three times....and still wish I was back working. Each time I retired, I got another job and worked for about a year; then I tried retirement again. I also taught computer basics to seniors on a volunteer basis. Now I am 72 and there are no jobs for me, so I try to keep active swimming and going to the gym, and spending time on my computer. -
Retirement is just a word
My husband and I retired a couple of years ago. He says he wonders how he ever had time to go to work. He has projects and hobbies that he had dabbled with earlier that are now fully fledged indulgences. I am happy to NOT get up and GO in the morning. I enjoy coffee and the paper, and then decide my day's adventure. We are closer than we have ever been because we can take the time to be that way. It is nice to stop during the day and say, "Let's take a break", because we do. I don't feel "retired". I feel that life has become richer and I am enjoying the heck out of it! -
Retire? I don't think so.
I could not imagine retiring. I have been a critical care nurse for 29 years, I love my job! Helping people when they are acutely, sometimes chronically ill is my passion. And seeing them walk out of the hospital so many days/weeks later, feeling much better, that is what it is all about. Also, helping their family through the difficult time, being there for them with calming words, or maybe a shoulder to cry on, or someone to sit by them. I could not imagine retiring from this. People helping people I also go on medical missions to help those who are less fortunate in other parts of the world. It tugs at your heart strings when you see the 3rd world population that have so little of anything, and yet, they are so gracious for the little time and care that you have given them. Retire? I don't think so. -
NO! NO! NO!
I thought retirement would be such a relief from having to get up at the crack of sparrows day after day, year after year managing, delegating and running an office for a minimum of eight hours Monday thru Friday. I looked forward to the time when I could do what I wanted without pressure and enjoy all the things that I like to do on a daily basis if I wanted. Oh, the disappointment to find that the discipline of over forty years is so engrained in me that I now feel as if I am taking up too much space on the planet. I see all the modern whizz kids driving their BMW's in the fast lane of their lives whilst I am left peddling my Prius in the slow lane of mine. I am still active mentally and sometimes want to take on the world. Instead, I go to the gym to keep everything moving and I sit on committees. I walk my dog and I spend hours fiddling on the computer. I use my talents as best I can and some times I'm even happy but it's not the same - it's different, very different. -
Retired and LOVING it.
My husband retired after 35 years at the post office. We had a beautiful 4 bedroom 3 bath house in a nice area in the Palm Springs area. Then the financial crisis hit us hard and we almost lost our home. So we decided to convert a master suite to a Casita with a nice paito. Rented the rest of the house out for 2 years. Worked beautifully, then our daughter had our first grandchild out of the area. Very disappointing. But after a few months they have aggreed to rent our house. So now, our mortgage is paid for and my daughter and new grandson are just a few steps away, all my dreams have come true. -
PLEASE DON'T RETIRE
I am a former teacher with a Master's Degree. I MISS MY STUDENTS TERRIBLY!!! I do NOT MISS THE B. S. the buraeaucracy at all. I miss MY PAY CHECK!! I retired at 65,000.00; my retirement until Social Security is $29,000.00. Kind of tough for someone with a KIND HEART, and ( FOOL on her forehead). In August 2007, I loaned " a friend" $3,000.00. ( Have Check ) Again in May of 2008, I wrote a check to him for $2,500.00. BOTH OF WHICH I HAVE NOTORIZED AFFIDAVITS of return payment. ( NEVER SAW PAYMENT ). Since retirement, I watch your show on a regular basis. I have NEVER LOANED anybody else money with the promise of " the oil deal is coming next week for MILLIONS ). THANKS for your advise to all the " Naive/Stupid" People in America who think " their friends are as honest as they are." NEVER EVER LEND MONEY TO ANYONE!!! ESPECIALLY if you're going to retire in a few years and be on a limited income!! Lesson well learned. -
Forced into Retirement
A year and a half ago, I was let go, due to financial problems at the job. I have been asking my husband since I was 40 when can I retire, he always told me soon enough. Well, my time came. I am 50 and LOVING being retired. I sound old fashioned, but I still have three kids living home. I have always wanted to be a stay at home mom and a housekeeper. At 50, my dream came true. I love staying home, cooking, cleaning (not so much) and not having to get up at 5am to get ready for work. I am not bored or lonely. I guess I am the few who truly loves staying home. No I don't hike, run, exercise or anything that might be good for me. But believe it or not, my day flies by. Just being home for my kids and hubby completes every day. -
Retirement: Loving it!
Retirement is a blessing! My husband I are both retired. He is a retired AF Officer & from Civil Services. I am a retired teacher & Alternative Education teacher. We both loved our jobs & enjoyed the work force. Now it is time for us to enjoy the next stage in our lives. We now have time to do what we want, when we want, & how we want. My husband saids, “everyday is a week-end.” We wake up every morning & say what are we doing today. Before we realize it, it is time for bed. We are active in several Senior Programs in our area that take trips, have intellectual classes as well as fun ones. I am in a Book Club, & several Red Hat Groups. At my Red Hat Conventions, I meet ladies from all over the U.S. We enjoy taking cruises. My husband has computer activities, & has a different perspective on yard work now. He has taken an interest with some house work & cooking. When I look back, every stage of my life has been wonderful & challenging; retirement is no exception -
Loving it!
I have a Masters degree in education and taught for 27 years. I had open-surgery when I was 41, then later developed uncontrollable high blood pressure, My cardiologist said the pressure of the job was too much and advised me to retire. I waited two more years before I finally agreed, retiring at the age of 54. How I wish I had listened to him sooner! I now have a freedom that I never knew existed, and I am no longer a slave to the clock. I can sew, crochet, scrap book, embroider whenever I want. I can go to lunch or the movies when I please. I enjoy being able to spend the time with my husband and 5 children. I know my fur-babies enjoy all the extra attention they get now that I am home. Best of all, my blood pressure is now controlled! My husband retires in 16 months, so it's only going to get better! I keep myself busy and I am never bored. I love it! -
OYE VAY THIS IS RETIRMENT....
After teaching Hebrew School for 45 years, my husband and I are retired. He taught juvenile delinquents for the YMCA. We live only on SS and a small pension from the Y. We have a reverse mortgage on our home of the last 40 years. Our "entitlement" is gone by the 15th of the month. We planned and God laughed...THIS IS RETIRMENT....actually its ok ....quiet/very quiet!!!!!!! -
Retirement Fear
My fear is that when my husband does retire, it will put more work on me. I'm one of those dinosaur wives who did everything around the house plus go to work in my later years. The concern is that when he does retire, I will be not working outside the home, but working overtime AT home. You know, cook, clean, iron, etc. 24/7. I'm afraid I'll feel trapped & always on call. I'm not sure retirement is a good idea for me. -
Why retire if you love what you do?
Judy, You don't seem like the "retirement" type to me. You appear to enjoy your job immensely, so why would you stop? I am retired from the Air Force after 26.5 years, but I'm the lazy type, so it's right for me. You don't stike me as the lazy type. Best regards, Steve -
I thought I was retired until----
Well, I was hanging around telling myself that I no longer had to get up early and I could do anything I pleased. But I woke up early just the same and could not find very many things that pleased me. After a walk and reading the miserable headlines in the paper, I did not know how I would enjoy doing nothing much every day. Honestly, I wanted to feel useful and needed. To my good fortune, I found out that the Government needed Test Administrators. I never gave a test in all my life but I learned and today, 10 1/2 years later at the age of 76, I am still going strong and working for the Military. There is life after retirement after all. If you want me to kvetch, carrying all of the test books from place to place is a pain in the tooch! -
Semi-Retirement Works For Us
My husband, 73, and I, 69, don't actually plan on retiring unless our knees go. He is a salesman who collects commissions and can choose to visit customers or not, and I work as a bookkeeper 2 days a week. We're not rich, but we can afford to travel somewhere every other month and during the summer, we take grandkids with us. We have 12 of them and live close to 8. Grandkids are a daily part of our lives. We also have separate interests: he belongs to a senior billiards club and is active in the community and I am taking a course to become a travel agent and I do some writing. We are both content and actually get along better together without the stress of jobs and raising a family. We never believed the hype about retiring to Florida. It's not the place where you live but the people you're near that make life worthwhile. -
What Was I Waiting For?
I retired as a college professor at the end of 2010. During my working life I had been a Probation Officer, a clinical social worker, and then a professor after earning a doctorate. At first I said 'yes' to everything I was invited to do because I was terrified I'd be bored. After the first year, I started paring down my activities. Now I go to a Light & Lively exercise class for seniors 3 times weekly, I've helped to start a book club, I bowl once a week, I've joined a knitting group, and I'm on the board of directors of my Home Owners Association. I LOVE retirement! I'm almost 70 and I am healthier, fitter, and happier than ever. To me retirement is freedom...I do what I want, when I want and if I want. I also make it my business to be at home at 3pm to see Judge Judy. If I don't my day is incomplete. -
Retired once, now I want to fully retired...
I spent 20 years in the military (Army). I knew that I was going to do 20 years. That was my goal. After only a month into my retirement, I was feeling depressed, and went back to work. I have been working for about 14 months, and I discovered a passion...triathlons. I want to retire for good so I can fully concentrate on exercising between 3 and 4 hours a day. I am looking forward for the big day (in about 6 months) when I can finally retired!! -
A real blessing!
I was forced into retirement 5 years before my time as my company with which I worked for 36 yrs closed its doors. I got a good enough gratuity which I invested in a rental apartment. Lucky for me my home mortgage was almost paid off. I never looked back!!! The secret is to start finding things to do on your own so that when the time comes and you are on your own, it would be a natural transition. My days are brimming over. I can now give my garden and my home my fullest attention.The results are obvious!!! Being an outdoor person, I hike twice a month, swim 5 days a week and walk hills on Saturdays. I also took a course in food preparation and cake decorating, and I'm pleased to say that I've had a few jobs. So between my apartment rental and my catering enterprise I do manage to live quite a comfortable life. The key to retirement is preparation. It's a whole new, different world out there waiting to be explored.You now have the time to do it!!! Prepare yourself!! Keep Fit!!! Blessings -
Retired and Tired
Retirement is an illusion, much like Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, or the Happily Ever After phrase...it is fun to imagine, but in all actually it causes depression, addictions like alcoholism, domestic assault and other unfortnate realities of mental illness. One of the wisest men the world has know referred to the worship of money and luxury as mere "Vanity"; thereby saying in the end, is worth nothing. In today's economic climate, it is not even worth "dreaming about" People who I have known personally who have expected the rainbow of retirement are now pursuing 12-step recovery programs, divorces and volunteerism. Simply put, there is no such concept as "gettting off the boat." In the "good ole days" Fred basked about in his garage to keep out of Martha's hair while she cooked and cleaned and laundered. Women Unite! The so-called retirement concept is just another way to keep you under the thumb. Balk at the concept, get to the gym, get active in the best years of your life -
What do you retire from, and into?
I'm not retired yet. I'm 37, but I'm guessing I'm lucky enough to have a career that I wouldn't ever really want to retire from, and I have the skill set for age to never really be an issue. So I guess it is a question or what are you retiring from, or indeed, what are you retiring to do? My folks retired at 54 and in my humble opinion, they've done nothing with their retirement. Conversations will often be about what they used to do in certain situations whilst working, and never really about what they did yesterday whilst retired. I think it's time to revaluate the whole retirement transition and maybe we should live life the way we wish to live in retirement, and vice versa. -
Do you have the time to retire?
My father retired about 15 years before he reached retirement age, they then moved from London to a coastal village on the south coast. After a few months they joined a bowls club and very quickly established a hectic social life. After a few seasons my father became club captain, and with this had the responsibilities of arranging social and fund ranging events, between them they where so successful to this day he remains club captain. His time is so tied up he told me after about 5 years he had no idea how he had time to go to work. Unfortunately about 6 years ago I was diagnosed with cancer and given 3 months to live, as you can tell I have far exceeded this, and, I just do not have enough time in the day to get what I want done. I travel constantly and now own 2 properties in Portugal. Life started when I retired and started to enjoy life instead of worrying about work and making money. My dad was right, retirement is great and I don't know how I could afford to go to work. -
Unanswered prayers...
Hi Judge Judy. When I was a young girl I remember absolutely hating the fact that I had to get up and go to work every day. I dreamed that somebody would come along who was willing to support me, or that I would somehow come into enough money so that I wouldn't have to work. Now I am 67 and here I am, still getting up and going to work five days a week. I live in Naples, Florida and that condo on the beach isn't very far down the road. But the thought of retiring scares me to death. A three day weekend seems too long these days. (Daytime TV is a bore. You don't come on until 4:00) And even though I have many interests and hobbies and lots of interesting things to do on my own, I know I would miss that busy little office with the ringing phone and all those papers and notes to take care of and people to keep happy. What I wish for now is that I can stay healthy and keep right on getting up and going to work 5 days a week. Funny how things have changed. -
Don't treat retirement as a holiday!
To give up a salary and work routine is a very big step! I think many people see it as one step closer to death rather than time to spend doing what you want. I retired in 2011 after many months of trying to make up my mind. I have not regretted one minute. I love gardening so I took on an overgrown allotment with a friend. We spend many happy hours there and it helps to keep us fit. I purchased a dog, something I could not do while working. We go on a different walk everyday so I get to see the beautiful British country or the beach. I get to spend more time with family and friends. I have time to travel. In fact I don't know how I found the time to work. Don't treat retirement as a holiday because you will soon be bored. Fill your days with people and things you enjoy. There are plenty of charities etc that need hep. -
Our joint retirement
My late husband and I were both employed by school systems, he from the Catholic School System and I from the local Community College. We retired the same year (he waited an extra year for me). We thought we would be bored and on each other's nerves. Not so! We retired on a small lake in Michigan, had a beautiful chalet home, two loving cats and were busy almost every day exploring things we never did before and lots of fishing and boating. Our love for each other grew deeper as we shared these things and we were never bored! Now I am alone, in a senior citizen community, which I love very much, but I miss my husband of 50 years so much! They keep us busy here so that I am not bored, just lonely, even though I have made many new friends. Most of us are retired, widowed, and financially pretty equal, so we get along very well. We help each other out, to Dr. visits, grocery shopping, companionship after surgeries etc. So retirement can be enjoyable even if you are by yourself. -
No thanks!
Judge Judy, first, I would like to say I started watching the Judge shows with Judge Wapner. He was good but none better than you - you are absolutely my favorite. I watch your show everyday and I respect and appreciate your talents. My husband retired two years ago. His retirement was mandatory because he had the years and the age. Although, he retired a year less than he had planned to I don't think it would have made any difference. He is truly retired. God has blessed us with a lovely home and the means to keep it and I am grateful but he doesn't do housework nor does he do yardwork. His time is spent lying in bed, watching TV, eating, playing games on the computer and TV and most recently "sweepstakes." Is this motivation for me to retire - excuse my profanity and no disrespect to you Judge Judy, but "hell no." I plan to work until I croak. -
I miss working! Have a great plan if you retire!
My name is Marcia and I retired the last of April-2012. I'd worked at a major hospital in Virginia as an admissions clerk for the day shift..STRESSFUL, to say the least and I was stressed to the max. I loved the challenge but our hospital is so very busy and just not enough beds for the patients that they see too. Major trauma center so...you can imagine...major problems when you need an ICU bed and have to move patients around to do so. Of course that move is directed by the nurses that work in the Bed Center. They tell us (clerks) which patient is to be moved and we try to make that happen. It might mean moving several around and that can mean major problems so, I felt it was best to get out of it and let the younger do it. Retirement sucks...no plan, and problems with money..hard to pass the day. So if you are planning on retiring..make a plan, have a hobby, friends to back you up and of course, money to do with. In the meantime, enjoy your work cause YOU'RE GOING TO MISS IT WHEN IT'S GONE!!! -
THE NOT SO GOLDEN YEARS
MY HUSBAND AND I PLANED A SIMPLE LIFE AT RETIREMENT. WE MOVED TO THE MOUNTAINS OF NE TENNESSEE, WHERE THE COST OF LIVING WAS LOW, SO WE COULD LIVE ON OUR SOCIAL SECURITY WITH EASE. BUT, IT DIDN'T WORK OUT THE WAY WE HOPED! WE NEVER GOT TO SPEND OUR "GOLDEN YEARS" TOGETHER! MY HUSBAND BECAME VERY ODD ABOUT 6 YEARS AGO, THEN VIOLENT. HE WAS DIAGNOSED AS BIPOLAR, WHICH WAS NOT CORRECT. AT LAST, IN SEPT 2009, HE WAS DIAGNOSED WITH A RARE FORM OF DEMENTIA (FRONTOTEMPORAL DEMENTIA, BEHAVIORAL VARIANT) SO, AT AGE 62 HE WAS ADMITTED TO A NURSING HOME. HE HAS BEEN THERE 3 YEARS NOW, AND IT IS VERY VERY SAD. I STRUGGLE DAILY JUST TO PUT ONE FOOT IN FRONT OF THE OTHER. NOW, I AM TRYING TO COME UP WITH THE COPAYS TO HAVE VERY THICK CATARACTS REMOVED, SO I CAN SEE AGAIN. THE "GOLDEN YEARS" ARE TARNISHED FOR ME, AND MY SWEET HUSBAND. IF YOU LOVE SOMEONE, DON'T SPEND A MOMENT IN ANGER, IT MAY BE THE LAST MOMENT YOU SHARE! -
Enjoying every minute!
I taught elementary school for 27 years. I had open heart surgery in 1996 at the age of 41, then developed high blood pressure that my cardiologist was unable to control with medication. He told me the stress of my job was too much and encouraged me to retire. I finally took his advice in 2006. WHY didn't I listen to him sooner??!! These past six years have been the best years of my life! I have no idea how I ever got anything done while I was working! I am constantly busy with different projects. I enjoy crocheting, sewing, baking, and scrap booking. I always have multiple projects going on at the same time, and I am always finding new projects to try. I love being able to spend more time with my husband, five kids, and four-legged babies. It's only going to get better when my husband retires in 16 months. The world is truly my oyster! I am no longer under the constraint of TIME. I am loving life! It's what you make of it! -
My JCPenney retirement
I've worked for JCPenney 40yrs. I was planning on retiring in the next couple years. They have never offered buy outs to "Associates" just Management. I survived many cuts over the years and always came out "ok", but in Sept.2011 they came a knocking. I'd flown under the radar for many years, but my age and my years got noticed and I have never been a Management person; they wanted me to go. I just turned 60. I felt like I was important to them, but I was wrong. My husband had to really talk to me and tell me it's over. All I have ever known is work...and work like crazy....but in the end and many tears later, I accepted their offer and retired in Feb. My husband had rearranged all our personal finances. We had saved like crazy, paid off my car, told me my hair & nail appts.were still in the budget...so I can honestly say it did turn out well. I give a lot of credit to my husband..married 40 plus years...he took care of everything while I getting my mind focused. -
Plan Ahead, Then ENJOY!
My partner (who is like RainMan, but with Judge Judy, NOT Wapner) retired 21 years ago at age 55. His supervisor's incessant "bitchiness" caused his beautiful salt & pepper hair to turn bluish white and gave him Bell's Palsy, so he left a relatively lucrative administrative job at a local university. Six months later, his hair returned to salt & pepper status and he has been retired for 21 years (and is VERY happy). At my partner's urging, I began investing any "extras" I had amassed about 12 years ago. Age 59 came & went, and I could no longer endure the rigors of my job (at the same university) without engaging in multiple bottles of wine in the course of a week. He finally got tired of my litany of complaints and suggested that I leave "that place", and that financially we would never be millionaires, but that we could still manage. I have been retired for 2 months now. We are *not* millionaires, but we budget well and live within our means, and WE LOVE YOU!!! -
I Can't Retire!!!
I have the opposite problem. My 13 year younger wife (55) is a homemaker. Without my job, I would have Medicare, but she would have nothing. Private health insurance, if you can even get covered, is far too expensive for a retiree on SS. I would love to be able to retire and tinker about the house, play golf, go hunting and fishing, etc. But it's not going to happen. If I even live for 10 more years when she will be eligible for Medicare, I will be to tired and infirm to do the things I enjoy doing. I have heard many stories of people (especially men) retiring and then dropping dead in 6 months or so because the become couch potatoes and lose their desire to live. Some people need the challange of their profession to keep them healthy. Love your show and book! Best regards :-) ... PS: Please don't retire, we see too many re-runs as it is and we love your show. -
Early retirement due to an injury...
I had to experience my retirement early, because I fell and got hurt pretty bad, and could not go back to work. I started working when I was 12 (lied about my age), and worked to get out of an abusive situation at home. I worked for relatives until I was old enough to get a work-permit, then I worked off and on for 37 yr for Holiday Inn (no benefits except insurance). I was a housekeeper. I did also go to college, while I was rasing 4 kids and working and got an Associates Degree in Housekeeping (go figure). I really wanted to work longer, because actually since I've been home, I have raised 3 of my granddaughters, and have welcomed 2 twin grandsons now, and my check barely covers my bills, so I don't have the extra money to endulge on my grandchildren how I would like, but I have lived through a lot of experiences to help the rest of the family to move on, with their lives, so it's good in an un-normal way I guess. Blessings to you. -
Singing in the Sunshine and the Rain
Judge, I am very happy in my retirement. I always thought I would teach well into my 80's b/c I loved my job/vocation so much. I taught public HS for 31 yrs. - 13 in NY, 5 in VA and 26 in GA. However, I hurt my back when I was about 58 and had to take an early retirement. I am having a blast just reading all the books I ever wanted to read, volunteering as a CASA for our legal system and also our local Hospice. I feel so appreciated now, lol. Sometimes, I feel like I wish I could find a part-time job, but no one wants to hire a 64 yr old on social security, I guess. But I am at peace with myself. I remember the Dean of Women at Fordham during my freshman year, giving us a welcoming speech, saying that if we can be happy in our retirement years, then our college would have done their part in making our lives a success. I never realized what she really was saying then, - but I remember her words and now....I understand. A very wise woman. She went on to marrying the Dean of Men - a Jesuit. -
Retirement no longer a blessing...
My husband and I put a small nest egg up for retirement. He was a disabled vet and when he died this year, they took all his retirement from me and reduced my widow's pension by 1 half. I am now approaching retirement in a few years but now will probably work even past retirement. My retirement is no longer a blessing but I watch people abuse the welfare and disability systems so I can understand why America is in so much debI. Judge Judy please run for president with Sarah Palin And get rid of welfare rats. -
Being bored is not boring - it is peaceful.
My co-worker advised me that when it is time for you to retire - you will know it. I didn't understand, until one day I arrived at work and realized that I didn't want to walk up those steps, I didn't want to punch in, I didn't want to wake up early anymore. It was time for Velda to do anything she wanted. I worked until I was 67. I have had no regrets - there are not enough hours in each day to do the fun things I like. I watercolor. I sew doll clothes. I visit my cousins, did some rewarding genealogy - found my elusive great-great grandmother that was Cherokee. I even discovered a photo of her - she's beautiful. I read best seller books. I collect funny family stories - we are just a bunch of wonderful hillbillies with ancestors that no matter how hard the times have been - there have always been stories, funny stories that warm us and entertain us. And I watch Judge Judy of course. Advice: you will know when the time is right to retire. -
I'm retired; my husband isn't.
My husband is a few years younger than me and has to work for another 8 years before he can retire. He works as a lecturer at college and we enjoy the breaks between the college terms together. I'm housebound (pretty much) due to a chronic medical condition but we treat his breaks as mini retirements as he gets so tired by the attitudes of the students.The first few days are spent 'chilling' then we get on with a project in the house or garden that we can work on together. We have 2 dogs which we both adore and he takes them for enormously long walks whilst I do my home things. I try not to vacuum around the dogs as they're scared by the noise. Although this isn't strictly speaking a retirement story, I don't foresee any difference in the pattern of our days when we're together full time. I don't just love my husband, I like him as a person and enjoy his company. We don't always agree on certain topics but that keeps life interesting. -
Recently retired and happy
First and foremost, I love you. Just finished watching your show and decided to come to the website. Basically looking for tickets to be in the courtroom. I retired July 31 2012 after working 39 years. I truly enjoy this new phase of life. One of the new adventures I've decided to embark on is visiting talk show tapings. When I first told my husband I was planning to retire, he thought I should keep working. Not happening. I want to be able to travel, experience new things while I'm still able to do so. I'm looking forward to taking part in some of the senior activities in my community. My husband is up at six to go work, I know he wants to ask 'are you off today'? I've been blessed with a husband that cooks. The only drawback to being retired, I have to cook. Thank my lucky stars he prefers to eat food of his African culture he prepares. -
Retirement only if:
I haven't worked at a 9-5 job for 20 years but am always doing something part time and always paying my own way. Retirement can be great only if: there's extra money to spend; you have someone to be retired with or friends close by with similar interests; some healthy interests to be involved in. Otherwise it would be lonely. -
Don't Wait!
My dear sweet wife told me to be patient and wait til I retire before it was "my turn" to get the time and attention we yearned for. Ten years before I retired, she got terminal breast cancer and she "retired". Looking back, I think we could have "slid" into retirement with more attention to longer weekends, an extra vacation or two, and maybe even more quiet time together, more intimacy. We were being practical and waiting. Life is what happens to you while you're waiting. DON'T WAIT. -
Retirement is wonderful.
Hi Judge Judy. First of all I want to say that I absolutely adore you, Your no-nonsense approach is refreshing and many times you say exactly what I am thinking in my head and saying in my "quiet" voice. Retirement is wonderful. I spent 40 years as a Neonatal intensive Care Nurse, high pressure for sure. Shift work and stress have been normal in my day to day work environment. In my retirement I wanted to see if I could paint and took up the art. I spend my days walking my dogs, spoiling my grandkids and painting. Every morning I wake up thinking that life is good and I guess that is an important attitude in retirement. Everyday to me is a gift and I keep myself fairly busy. One issue I do have is that I can be a bit of a recluse, so get lonely at times. But when I paint that hole seems to fill. I miss the social part of the work environment, but not the pressure. Life is good, Judge Judy. Sincerely, Sue -
My view on retirement...
I do not ever want to retire. I am single and my job provides me with both emotional and financial stability. I read an article recently about a judge in New York, I think it was Brooklyn, who had to retire and then became a JHO (Judicial Hearing Officer) and works for FREE full time as a JHO, because he said that he has seen too many of his colleagues retire and die shortly thereafter. -
Forced retirement...Life is good.
I am a Registered Nurse with over 35 years experience in a profession I loved. At 61, I find myself on unemployment for the first time in my life. I live in the country and have limited work options. When my employer downsized, the expensive old one was the first to go. It seems the accountant doesn't value my experience like my patients did. So I am still trying to learn how to be one of the retired. I laugh at myself because I guess I always thought I would control the how and when of it. Humans love to think they control everything. I knew better. I saw hospice patients all the time. They taught me who is really in charge here. So this new retirement chapter of my life is just starting and I am learning to enjoy it. Yesterday I had Bocelli blasting while I planted more of my beloved iris. I was loving the day while my neighbors worked. Life is good. -
Works for us!
I retired after 33 years as a teacher in 2003. Do I miss teaching? The short answer is a loud YES. However, as the years went on and I stopped romanticizing about the job. I cherished the carefree retirement years. Everyday I worked I had an 6,7,8 or 9 year old tell me how pretty or smart or lovable I was. A day never passed without a hug and an, " I love you! ". The great thing, for me, is that my life still includes children, so the part I missed so much is still present. My husband, who also was a teacher, and I enjoy day to day activities. We travel when we want, sleep till we get up, see friends and family on a whim and just enjoy life. I can't think of a day that I used the word BORED. We both have common interests and individual interests. The creativity I loved as a teacher is part of my here and now too. We are truly a very happy couple. Retirement works for us. -
Forgotten
Our family was very close, with our house being the main gathering place for special events and drop by visits. When my husband and I retired at ages 62 and 63 and bought a mobile home close to Tampa, our kids and grandkids found a life without us. We only go to Florida for three months, which includes Nov. and Dec. We rarely see them in the summer, and that is when we visit them. They are busy so we don't bother them often. Friends that we use to run around with are spending more time with their family as they get old. We spend all our time together, and I feel that boredom will drive us apart. Also, when one of us is gone, what will happen with the other one. We are 72 and 73 years old. I miss the exciting life we use to have, but don't know what to do to make it better. We are truly forgotten. RETIREMENT IS A CURSE -
Retirement.......
I'm fast approaching 75 on Nov. 20th. I am retired, but busier now than I was when I was working full time. And I like it that way! I'm a writer among other things, and being home is perfect for what I do. I also volunteer for the developmentally disabled and maintain my own home. I don't find retirement daunting. In fact, I like being able to do what I want, when I want. My only obligations are to my little dog. I've been a widow for over 4 yrs. My children are grown and on their own, but I still find the days flying by, leaving very little time to belly-ache and boo-hoo about much. I feel genuinely blessed. -
The Season for Act Three
I have a degree in Accounting... that in and of itself is a self-induced death wish... A manager, somewhere on high, noticed that I had a rapport with my co-workers, and a knack for expressing myself in writing, so I was offered the job that was vacant in Human Resources. I had no background in writing or PR, and wondered why she would even consider me. It was as though the job was created for me...a bit of travel, interaction with people from all walks of life, publishing the company newspaper. I spent 25 years in that setting, and my company was sold. I worked as office manager for my son-in-law another seven years, still travel a bit, and now I reside in an apartment near my two youngest granddaughters (and not far from the other 8 grands), and I'm STILL where I belong...Life is wonderful...I LOVE being old, retired, (and single) !!! -
Blessing AND a Curse!
Retirement is both a blessing and a curse as now you have money and time however, you don't have youth on your side, eyesight is failing, high blood pressure, bones creaking, hair and skin not what it was. There is more of a chance something will happen to you or your spouse in the way of accidents or illness. However you do have time (God willing) to enter into activities you didn't have time when working. I loved my job but it was time to leave. My husband hated work and couldn't wait to retire, so we retired at the same time, lovely. We joined in community activities, applied for game shows and had holidays then trying to keep active my husband. He slipped on wet grass and damaged his leg - so what now? - confined to the house for five months till his leg heals. Oh the joys of retirement. We shall leave ourselves in God's hands and make the most of it till he calls us home to himself after all we are all heading for our heavenly home for eternity, this live is passing away. -
Finally!
My husband and I married at a young age and started working in separate factories. We started a family four years after with our first. Nine years later, we had our second child. We didn't have babysitters or parents giving us support. It was great. Our kids were raised going to day care at 6 am until one of us picked them up in the afternoon. They played, we had dinner and they went to bed early. My husband worked for 30 years before retiring. I just retired after 35 years. We will soon be married 37 years. We can finally afford a nice home and the kids are gone. We are middle class, have to keep to a budget, love to golf and have learned to shop Walmart and clip coupons. We are embarrassed to know how much money we spent on silly, needless things we didn't need and took for granted. Life is too short to not have time to enjoy some good relaxing time with your spouses. Retirement is an adjustment with give and take but well worth it for us. -
Our Retirement Story...
My husband retired in March of 2007, and I was still working until May of 2007 when my back went out and I went on disabities. Our bills were met. He got bored as we couldn't travel because we had adopted 2 grandkids so he got a part time job. May I add that my back problem kept me from doing a lot of things included traveling but it's ok. We are happy and so I will say retirement is a blessing to us because it gave us more time for our kids which we couldn't with our older kids as we had to work all the time to make ends meet. -
Retirement concerns...
Judy I am just worried about paying bills etc when I get to retirement age in 20 yrs - I won't have a pension except old-age here in Canada. I will probably become a crossing-guard or school bus-driver because I will need an income and a reason to get up in the morning. -
Wouldn't go back to work
I'm 60 and one year into my 2nd retirement. The first time was fun. My wife & I travelled throughout the US in our small camper. I then fell into a job running a small company, wherein I trained my replacement and after four years retired a second time. We still travel, but I am also involved playing accordion in an active club, daily pool at the senior center where I have made new friends, mushroom hunting and fishing. The thought of having to be somewhere at a specific time, as would be required even for part time employment, no longer appeals to me in the least. We're content. Small trips, along with occasional month long get-aways are always on our planning radar. -
Glad I retired
I live in the UK, and retirement age is now 61 years to obtain the state pension. I started a new job in June 2011 which proved very demanding working with the public designing kitchens, going into people's homes and discussing their requirements. How the world of retail has changed, for the worse. Customers are more demanding and rude. When the opportunity came to give up the job I took it willingly; money is ok. I felt after 46 years of working, I needed a break from the pressures of work. I am enjoying time to myself. Whether I will become bored who knows, and if I do maybe I will do something else. I constantly joke about being a pensioner, and just enjoy each day as it comes. -
Retirement?
I have just a short few years to retirement age and something that I'm looking forward to. At the same time, I can't imagine not keeping busy doing something. Crafts and hobbies have their limits. I see myself working part-time to supplement my income and volunteering some of that extra time too. Another exciting time of life. -
Recently Unemployed
Hi Judy , First and foremost.....I Love you, I live in Brooklyn, I'm 63 years old, and have been in the music business my entire life as a musician and radio producer. I loved my job, worked 6 days a week for 19 years, and never thought it would end. I managed the famous Colony Records in Times Square for 12 years. It recently closed due to high overhead and declining business. It was there 63 years. The shock of losing a job and not having a daily purpose is depressing. I've only been out of work for a week, and I already have shpilkas. I don't want to retire (ever). As long as I can work, I will. Even if I was wealthy, I couldn't see retiring. If Bird ever retires, let me know ! Whenever I'm in a decision making happenstance, I always say, What would be Judy's take on this ? You keep me out of trouble. I love you madly, I watch every day! There's no one smarter, hipper, or wiser than you ! All my best to you. -
Husband just retired
My husband, after 34 years of working in movie production (construction) retired and HE LOVES IT!!! He stays very busy working around the house, working on his many music projects and just helping me. I still work, but only for two more years, then I am done. I am not nervous about "what are we going to do" with ourselves. There is so much to do. We plan to help more in our church, travel and just enjoy life!! With no time schedules. As for the money part, we are fine. With pension, IRAs and soon social security, we have money to live. We have no debt and our house will be paid off in less than 5 yrs with a house payment under $900! Retirement is just the next level of living, only this time on your terms. -
RETIRED AND LOVVVVVING IT!!!
We have been married almost 55 years. My husband retired about 20 years ago (he is 80) and I retired at 71 (I am 73). WE LOVE IT...NO ALARM CLOCKS...NO BOSSES...NO TRAFFIC..NO SCHEDULING...TAKE YOUR TIME EATING BREAKFAST...GETTING DRESSED..GO WHEREVER YOU WANT WHEN YOU WANT....COME HOME WHENEVER YOU WANT...TRAVEL AND TAKE CRUISES WHENEVER....PLENTY OF TIME TO SPEND WITH THE GRANDCHILDREN AND VACATION WITH THEM...NO BETTER TIME IN YOUR WHOLE LIFE...LOVE IT! -
Not so bad
My husband retired 5 years ago and loves it because he goes dog walking 4 times a day in various parks and meets many folks and their canines. I, on the other hand, just retired in June and all of my acquaintences were from work. I just enrolled in graduate courses and have seriously started looking for PT work. I love the freedom of retirement but miss the challenges the Corporate world provided my otherwise mundane life. Another factor is family and friends are 800 miles away in the NY metro area. -
Yellow Hard Hat
One brisk summer day I was waiting for my dad. There he was in his yellow hard hat. I was so proud to see this. I believe it was a blessing. We would go to breakfast, shopping and other venues. One neighbor called us the three bears. Mom would have a lot of jobs for Dad and he would work fifteen minutes and rest forty five minutes. She once said you are going to get blisters from sitting. He didn't have to keep a schedule and got to take his grandchildren to the park but not in his yellow hard hat, but his baseball cap. -
So far, so good...
I retired in January, 2012 from 35 years of teaching Special Needs Students. I am enjoying retirement so much! There are no schedules, no paperwork and I can come and go whenever I want. I have moved from New England to Western NC and I have spent much time landscaping and finding places for the many things I packed. There is always something to do or not do, depending on the mood of the day. I have joined clubs and I am doing things I enjoy that I did not have time for when I was working. -
HAPPY BEING RETIRED
My husband retired after being disabled in 97. We are happy being in our home, enjoying the family and the grandkids. I've been retired six years and love it. -
Not what I expected...
I looked forward to retirement and counted the days after 36 years in the public schools. I enjoyed the first year, I rested and caught up on exercise, reading, friends. Now what? I miss being needed I miss the comaraderie with my coworkers. I volunteer in a local school, but am treated like a dinosaur by younger teachers. My pension is enough for monthly expenses but not enough for world travel. My work was my identity. If I could do it over again I would have taken a year off and not retired. -
My Retirement Story: Great so far!
I am newly retired. My last day of work was August 1st. I had a very stressful job. I had deadlines every day as well as having a caseload of 53 adults with disabilities. I needed to do all the required paperwork as well as working one-on-one with each of my consumers as well as working with the direct care staff in training on programs that were implemented for my consumers. All my life I have wanted to be in a position to help others - help people and play to my passions. I am now working as a volunteer in a local shelter for abused women and children. I work as a child mentor, but work only 2 days a week for two hours a day. I get to do what I love without the stress of a "job." I am still feeling like I am making a difference. I also am active at our local Senior Center. Also, there are fun day trips and sometimes week long trips that my husband and I go on about once a month. Best of all I have time to be with my grandchildren. Retirement has been great so far. -
Happy Retirement
Judy, I taught middle school for 36 years and never thought about retirement until that last year. Things have changed so much in education that I was ready to get out. The first year I did a lot of subbing because I missed the people I work with so much. The second year, I didn't sub as much and this third year, I have subbed very little. I am enjoying my sister's grandkids (I don't have any) and just doing whatever I want. Retirement rocks! -
Bored To Death
My dad is retired by force. His health does not let him work anymore and he is 58 years old. Now he plays dominoes all day, and I am worried that he is bored. I think if he retired with things to do it would be different. But I find myself wondering when a person retires does he/she go to their grave quicker if they are not occupied. -
Retirement: Try it, you might like it!
I made my husband retire when he was 62 1/2. He kept saying wait wait, but now he is so happy. We have been traveling and he loves it. He is relaxed and happy, and so am I. We don't have a lot of money but we go to KOA and park our RV. We love seeing the new sights. Try it you might like it. -
A WAY TO END YOUR MARRIAGE
My husband and I retired 4 years ago. He decided that meant everywhere I go, he goes. If he does not want to go out, I am not going out. I finally told him 3 months ago to find somewhere else to live before I hated his guts. We were married 20 years but enough is enough. -
We like it!
My husband first of all loves you...I do too. We are both retired Navy, I was an E6 with 20 years, he was an E8 with 28 years. The girls are grown and out of the house. I still work part time about 4 hours a day 5 days a week. He is the best stay at home guy. he cooks and cleans and does all the yard work and maintains the pool in the summer. He is happy; me, I have to go to work just to do something, gets me out of the house. On the weekends, we go to car shows just to have something to do....so make sure you have something to do together are you will go crazy. Good luck to you and your choice. P.S. We would have loved to see you on the presidental debate...I can see you pounding the mallet....I am talking ....look at me....hahahah lol