Episode 38

Social Media: For Better or Worse?

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I was a late bloomer in the area of social media. If I wanted to invite someone to my home, I reached out with a phone call or a handwritten note. Now of course, I reach out with an email. It's not the personal way that I was brought up with, and I wonder if I have the same connection with my friends as I had before. Is sending a quick email the same as picking up the phone and saying 'you know, you've been on my mind lately...I wanted to hear your voice.' Do you think we're losing a little bit of our humanity because of all this technology? Let me hear your thoughts.


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  1. A Phone Call for Sure!

    by Peter A phone call is better in my opinion. You can hear the person and you might even make their day!
  2. Social Media from an 18 Year-old's Perspective

    by Evelyn Communicating via social media is normal for me, I can't imagine calling my friends as opposed to just texting them. But I do think it means more to call someone than communicate through texts or other messaging systems. Phone calls take more time and effort. I have made friends from all over the world through social media, though.
  3. Social Media: For Better or Worse

    by Margit I am, with great pride I might add, a baby boomer and sincerely believe that humanity has lost its communication skills since the world has been devoured by the high tech communication through social media. It is not only a matter of writing an email or sending a text message rather than picking up the phone or inviting over for a drink or dinner. Unfortunately social media made easy way to brutality, terrorism, political instability, self-centredness and cheer insanity including online harassment and deliberately provoked bullying. I attended the university before Google was launched - that means studied without "copy paste". It seems that by 2030 we will have robot assistants looking after the very young children, machines even able to order and pick up hamburgers for dinner and certain robot models will be created to be married and operate "in full" as a married partner (internet article end Feb 2017). I doubt on life's human qualities & the world being created by Millennials!
  4. Losing humanity due to social technology/media

    by Kimberly Technology has taken over people visiting families, Mother, Fathers, and Children due to cell phones, Facebook. We need to get back to going to Daddy and Mama's on Sunday after church and having dinner, then to visit with Grandparents. That's what we need to get back to.
  5. Connecting with friends over the globe

    by Rose I am retired. Using social media, I stay in contact with former co-workers, friends, family, and have made friends all over the world. I play games daily with friends in Europe, Australia, and Asia. People that I never would have had an opportunity to know without social media. I certainly would have lost contact with many friends without social media and have reconnected with old friends. It amazes me that with a smart phone or iPad, we hold all the knowledge of the known universe in our hand. I can even talk to one of my heroes, JUDGE JUDY!
  6. Judy ... Judy ..Judy !

    by Maria We have most definitely lost some humanity !!! Especially the younger generation. I was trying to have a conversation with my neice , TRYING... she's holding her phone & looking at herself in the mirror. I tried to engage calmly, NOT !! They are so self involved. It's ONLY about how Hot you are ! Gag me ! They can't converse without a phone !! They go to school and come out stupid. Have NO idea what's going on in the world. Wish I didn't either lol. People are loseing more & more common sense ! It truly saddens me. But YOU my dear Judge .. are a breath of fresh air !! I too am a no nonsense kind of girl. Love me or leave me !! But as you know, people say they want the truth. But they don't !! God help us all , especially the world leaders !! Luv Ya Marie ( a Brooklyn transplant ! )
  7. Social Media Woes

    by Donna Are we loosing our humanity because of, or due to social media? I believe we are, our spelling is horrid, our self responsibility and self control has dropped to almost zero. Kindness and empathy no longer exists either. Why? Because on Facebook and other media outlets we can say anything without thinking or actually facing repercussions. We have turned into mean, backstabbing freaks with no humanity. Young parents have their faces in the phones 24 hours a day, as small children try to raise themselves. Idiots think they can hold any conversation anywhere, and all others must hear every detail! If we dare tell them to go elsewhere, or tell them to hang up...we are yelled at, thrown things at, and have to face threats. I signed up for FB just for easier access to grandchildren's pictures, and found that if I bother reading just about anything I leave in a very bad mood....blessing The Lord that I don't have to grow up in this new world!
  8. Emotions...

    by Barbar When we went from picking up a telephone to E-mailing, we lost our ability to express and to feel Emotion. Now we have entered into a world of coldness. When my Mom died, and I was expressing my deep saddness through e-mail I was unable to express the deep emotional turmoil that I was feeling. In this day and age, we have suceeded in severing Human Emotions
  9. There Is This About That...

    by Graham If you are having a heated exchange with someone, I find that texting gets the information across while taking the emotion out of the equation. That can be good when you have to communicate with someone but cant do it without yelling. However, personally, I like to look at the person I am talking to...I can't stand trying to lunch or another activity and the other person is constantly checking their phone or tablet or other device...nothing can replace the attention you give and get when two or more people are using 100% of their focus on the other person(s). I can do basic things on the computer and I use an old cell-phone to talk or text but nothing like all the stuff people commonly do now...I dont want to spend 4 or more hours trying to figure out how to work some application or whatever...I have things that need more attention...like vaccuming, washing...and if I have some "me" time, I like to put all the "toys" away and watch a little TV with some vino!
  10. Losing Humanity Due to Social Media

    by Ravis Yes, we are losing humanity due to social media because sending emails and text messages are so impersonal. To me, it's an easy outlet to avoid long-winded friends and acquaintances but simultaneously, one can say that he/she has been in communication with each other. Hearing their voices give a sense of ease as to how they're really doing...to hear them laugh or cry means so much more. Let's not cut off humanity due to social media...instead, let's pick up our phones and get back to a more personable sense of communication!
  11. What happened to Thank You notes?!

    by Linda My eldest grandchild, 24, sends me charming hand-written thank-you notes for gifts I send her, and I am elated to receive them. My other two grandchildren, ages 19 and 22, used to use FB or email or texting to thank me, but now even that has fallen by the wayside. In 2018, then, my gift-giving is also going to fall by the proverbial wayside. If they can't be bothered to let me know my gift arrived (and is appreciated), then I can't be bothered to write those checks any more.
  12. Social Media

    by Carolyn Gail I am as informed at 56 years old as I can be concerning computers and social media. I enjoy it and I learn from it everyday. However, once a week, I still sit down and write a hand written letter to my father who lives 3 hours away in the mountains. He 85 and looks for my letters to arrive. You can not replace that feeling with an email.
  13. email vs personal touch

    by Susan I absolutely agree with you judge judy. I miss the old days with the personal touch, face to face or by phone. Much more personal!
  14. Technology

    by Terry I love technology! With it I keep more in touch with family and friends that live far away. When I don't want or don't have time for a long conversation, I just send them an e-mail or text. This allows them to answer on their own schedule, which is often a very busy one. I believe it is a great gain for humanity! I also love your show!
  15. Depressed / shyness

    by Leon Social media. It is nice for ''sometime'' but it may not become a replacement for face to face communication. Live communication should be priority nr.!!! Example:In Holland almost EVERY teenager who rides on a bike, plays with an Iphone(or kind of) in one hand and paying NO intention to traffic etc. At family meetings (Christmas etc.) teenagers and sometimes adults sitting arround constantly gazing on a screen of some kind. I think Social media makes a lot of people A-social. I am very curious if there comes a black-out for more than 24 hours,.. how many people (especially teenagers) can communicate to another human being in a proper way???
  16. Social Graces

    by Irmgard Social media has taken over every aspect of our lives. I think we have lost personal graces because of it also. I see people on the phone while out to dinner with each other or in a group. How very sad. We have given up the only thing that separates us from the animals, verbal and facial communication. I firmly believe that it will destroy us, our humanity, our ability to feel empathy for each other. We are already seeing it with young people, the ability to look you in the eye is going away, no longer is a handshake an affirmation of ones promise and honor, we simply don't do it any more. I for one am happy to have grown up in a time when a look could stop me in my tracks or make me run into my grandparents arms. I hope I am wrong, but I doubt it.
  17. An Impersonal Generation

    by Denise Growing up I can honestly say I truly enjoyed my families. We often did visit family and even spend dinners together. Other times, we talked on the telephone to keep in touch. The phone you can hear if a person is sick, upset etc. I do not like texting either. Today, I have relatives, friends, and acquaintances who prefer to text or use social media sites to communicate. I find it very impersonal. Recently, I had been told by a relative don't call just Facebook her that she was too busy. Social media is okay for connecting with classmates, if it is used in moderation. Many unsupervised children are going on social media sites adding people they do not know and getting into trouble. I only see it getting worse. I have a niece and 2 nephews. If not for social media I would not know anything about them. They don't ever want to call or visit. We only see pictures and conversations on social media. I think social media is making our society socially inept. I pity our upcoming generations.
  18. Social Media: Good and Bad

    by Jen Good - because it's convenient. Bad - because tone is lost; thus, intent can become a gray area. I also find this leads to unnecessary drama. I think this has hurt humanity. Overall, new technology is good for me because I have TBI (Traumatic Brain Injury) and it's best for me to communicate electronically as I deal with speech and memory problems. People often ask me if I'm drunk, but I have traumatic brain injury. I now have an online business because who really wants to hire a paralegal with TBI?
  19. social media zombies

    by Colleen I still don't have a facebook account, nor do I tweet. I work in a computer shop so it isn't from lack of understanding. I enjoy talking to people. We aren't meant to be isolated the way people are becoming. It would explain some of the constant anger. Seems people are overly in love with their own opinions. Parents are even MORE out of touch with what their kids are doing or what they're dealing with not to mention with whom! It seems to take away opportunities for parents to be there with their kids to teach coping skills for what they may be dealing with on a social network. It may be cool to talk to someone on the other side of the world. As a way of life and dealing with peers, it takes the humanity out of the equation. That alone makes people bolder in their statement and cowardly in the consequences of what that say and do to others.
  20. My more legible communication

    by Timothy I agree with you that an email or text is not as personal as phone call or letter. I think it has made it too easy to communicate now. I remember being a pen pal as a kid to my cousins 8 hours away. It was a bit of a chore but I managed to do a fair job. However, not having time to run by the post office, or having a stamp handy and to get a surprise email or text or FB from an old friend does have an advantage. It's easier, I can type faster than I can write and it is much more legible. I rarely use the phone at all any more. I love the online experience much better than the old days (and I am 50 years old) but I do think it loses a personal touch somehow than to see the persons effort made in a letter with a stamp or to hear their voice and hear the sincerity in what they are saying. I have changed with the times like yourself and i doubt I'd ever go back, BUT I think you have a valid point. You can email or write me any time. I would always welcome hearing from my favorite judge :)
  21. Technology is fast but cold.

    by Sherrie Dear Judge Judy, Only those of us who grew up in a less techno-savvy world would even think to ask this question. Like you, I frequently use the email, when I would have used the phone, years ago. I also was a slow convert to the email world of communications, but I found a fun way to help myself, by stepping back into the world of "snail mail," as the kids call it. I now keep a treasure trove of "Thinking of You" greeting cards, little and big, fancy and not so fancy. I grab one out anytime and drop a line of two or three, to reach out to someone. What nice reactions this gets from my fellow humans! I get thank you phone calls and return notes! Houston, we have contact... this is what is missing from emails, the FEEL of two way HUMAN CONTACT. This old fashioned mail is slow, but it is FUN to anticipate your fellow human being receiving the card in their hands, that you chose just for them, and enjoying your message, in your own handwriting. This satisfies what is missing from emails!
  22. Born into technology.

    by Jacob I as a youngster was born into a world of technology, but hearing my grandmas stories about the world before iPhones, I wish I had been around to know how to do things the old fashioned way, and to be able to go back to a time period where your friends wouldn't make fun of you for what kind of phone you have, or what your financial status was. These days, the only thing any teens my age care about is the latest pop song or the newest selfie on Instagram. It's very frustrating to me to have to constantly listen to improper grammar and slang. Such as "bae" "or nah" "ratchet" or all the other teenage nonsense. I appear to be the only teen to feel this way in my town.
  23. The Time's They Are A Changin

    by Duane Have to go with technology. I'm 60 and tried to keep up with changes so I could continue to connect with my children. They were always priority number one. Sending an email, text, Tweet or facebook post still makes my old friends happy. Don't have to worry about them being in the shower etc. They can respond when it's convenient for them and likewise. We can also setup a good time for a phone call. The teens and younger is what I worry about. The irresponsible ones are abusing the technology with sexting, bullying or some other form of deviant behavior. I am currently going under chemotherapy so anytime I reach out to friends or family with todays technology I get quick responces. My 82 year old parents, I CALL! That ship sailed long ago For them to learn on a computer or smartphone. It's too bad because my Mom has a sister that lives 2000 miles away and could keep in touch everyday with todays technology. Her sister has a computer and emails my cousins and could email her. Oh well.
  24. Facilitating interaction.

    by Aimee-Deborah I'm 20 years old and I am a product of the technology age. At university I consume everything online, from TV and world news to cutting edge scientific research. Maybe there weren't tablet PCs when I was a child but i had my first online profile (on MSN) by aged 11. Social media tends to have a bad reputation because it removes the 'personal' from our everyday interactions. However, growing up with a friend with asperger's syndrome, the internet and social became a platform where they could learn and develop conversation skills with out the feeling of being judged and without the discomfort of eye contact. As their abilities increased so their face-to-face interaction skills. Today they live an incredible life with an ever expanding social life and a wonderful partner. They have always said that none of it would have been possible without social media. To me social media, and the internet as a whole, is a place to communicate, share, educate and learn when used wisely.
  25. Social Media is Just Another Tool

    by Donna I'm 60 years of age. So like you, Judge Judy, I grew up before the Internet and Social Media. We didn't grow up using computers or mobile phones back then. We spoke to our friends and family in person and over the phone. And, of course, there was snail mail to send letters long distance because we didn't want to run up the phone bill. Everything is instant today! You can send an email with pictures to several people at one time. You can send out invitations to everyone in a day's notice, without postage or handwritten notes addressed to each one. You can now call, email, or post things on Facebook without the long distance charges. However, there are some drawbacks. Everything is less personal in this present communication style. Even searching and applying for a job nowadays is all done over the internet. You won't know the status on your job application unless you are called back on it... and you can wait hoping for nothing on a call that never comes in.
  26. Social Media

    by Claire I enjoy talking on the phone to close family and friends. I learned to type at James Madison HS in Miss Hauptman's class for 2 years...I still use my typing on my PT job and of course at home...but I call to keep in touch....I cannot comprehend the younger generation with the texting thing....they just don't know how to have a normal conversation. Facebook? is nice to send photos to my large family/friends still living in Brooklyn but that is where it ends...we all have our phone numbers and keep in touch when we choose. BTW Judge Judy...proud to say you graduated from Madison...I was class of 63. Best regards!
  27. Manners and civility in the age of social media

    by Ivy I can understand few benefits to social media; immediate news and instant information perhaps..but young children/teens, even some adults it seems to be more of a tool for bullying and self importance. By self importance I mean selfies, and minute by minute updates on gossip or commenting on a meeting or class you are in, instead of actually participating in it. If you were face to face with a person or on the phone most people would never make the negative and hurtful comments to them to their face that they do online. The empathy and civility we learned growing up is now disappearing. Children today become unable to deal with people and situations in real life because online has become real life to them. Parents have less and less control over what their child is doing on all these different media devices, access is everywhere. It has created a forum from which young people can not make mistakes with out it forever being a scar. Everything is a record. There are no second chances.
  28. It All Depends

    by Diana For me Social Media helps me to keep in touch with my family each day. I have not lost my old habits of calling them and I don't want to, either. I love to hear my mom's voice every day. It gives me reassurance that she is doing well, I enjoy sharing our love, and more. I use WhatsApp to hear about the rest of my family every day but a phone call is always at my fingertips. Facebook on the other hand... I don't have it anymore. It actually irritates me when I see my friends and their children communicating through it, even to say "I'll call you tonight." I don't think it is a good idea to lose privacy in the family or the human touch for the sake of social media. Social Media has gotten a lot of people in trouble; many have lost their job due to lack of control or wisdom. In conclusion Social Media could be a great feature depending on the person or business behind it.
  29. Nothing Like a Live Voice

    by Bunny I cannot stand texting! I don't do it and don't want to receive any. I think it is so rude. All I see is folks walking around looking down and texting. They even do it while grocery shopping! They no longer know how to spell and I feel that if someone wants to reach me they should telephone. It's just as bad getting a menu of recorded directions. I will always return a phone call. I do emails but those are for groups I belong to who live all around the world and even sometimes I phone when my cell is free!
  30. Social Media and Education

    by Bev Perhaps the greatest impact with social media is in education. On the one hand, it expands students' horizons to communicate on a global level. On the other hand, to get a "good job" txt from a teacher is just not the same as a pat on the shoulder and a personal smile. Our ways of communicating certainly are changing, and changing rapidly. I wonder if kids in the future will understand simple across the table dialogue as I watch them exiting schools not talking to others but instead talking in keystrokes on their phones. Is getting a "Happy Birthday" txt the same as having someone call or getting a handwritten card in the mail? As with everything, extremes are never good. My hope is that both the advantages of social media and its ills find a reasoned future.
  31. Social media is just another tool for communicatin

    by Gigi We used to just grunt.Then came cave drawings, then eventually written word, the telegraph, the telephone, and so on. Now technology has provided us with new tools to use for communication, but most the old ones are still available as well. It's up to us which forms we choose when communicating. Certain things are better expressed in person, this is true. But social media is a terrific way to stay in touch with people you may not get a chance to see often. I enjoy seeing a young friend's wedding pictures. I like the freedom to express myself to a group of people. I don't think it should replace regular interaction, but emailing and texting can be very convenient.
  32. There Is Nothing Like The Sound Of 1's Voice...

    by Tammie The World Has Sped Up A Little To Much For My Taste!! There Truly Is Something Personal About Having Someone CARE ENOUGH TO STOP, And DIAL UR # & ACTUALLY TALK TO U FOR A WHILE... or more over, SIT DOWN AND WRITE YOU A LETTER!!! These are Reasons TO Know Without A DOUBT THAT U R IMPORTANT!!! These Create in Us MEMORIES!!! When Will You U Hear A Loved One Say AFTER U PASS, I Remember When This Person SENT ME THIS EMAIL... OR TEXT?? Text R Ment ( I'm Finding) To B SHORT!!! Emails r Truly NOT Really a discussion..So Without Real Personal Contact How Do We Truly Find Out If Our Loved 1's NEED MORE THAN WE REALIZE? Social Media Removes us From That Personalization!!! We Can Usally NOT 4C Someone's DEATH!! SO NEVER MISS AN OPPORTUNITY 2 TELL THOSE U CARE ABOUT HOW MUCH THEY MEAN TO U!!! THAT IS WHAT IS MISSED IN SOCIAL MEDIA. THAT IS AN OPENING THAT U WILL REGRET 4EVER! EVERYONE SHOULD KNOW THAT THE LAST WORDS WERE I LOVE U
  33. Social Medias and Family

    by Linda Just like anything else coming out to "help" us can also hurt us as well. My experience is seeing all of those who "isolate" themselves because they have no reason to "mingle"...my concern also relates to those adults who cannot place medias aside; who allow those things to become such a part of their being that the really close connection to parenting, mentoring of their own children seems not to be as important. Yes, sadly, there are great numbers of these people out there who are "teaching" their children intentional or not to become isolated, disconnected people/parents in another generation. My daughter sometimes comes by and says, Mom your phone isn't working...I say I know, I turned it off....smile...and say would I have seen you this week if it had been on? My suggestions to young people to take a "break" are met with the same reaction as if I had asked them to not eat for a week. We have choices of how to incorporate these things into our lives....so lets be wiser.
  34. Multitasking

    by Karen G Using social media to connect with others allows us to reach more people in a smaller amount of time, and while completing other tasks. However, I think it has diminished the quality of those connections for those reasons. Even dating now seems to be more about texting and less about real intimacy.
  35. facebook is elaborate emails with pictures

    by Stacia I like Facebook because you can keep up with people and their lives through pictures and posts. I used to keep up with friends through emails. Facebook is elaborate emails with pictures. This is the extent - it should not be used to air dirty laundry and hurt reputations. Parents need to monitor what their kids are reading - if they see garbage - pull that plug. I believe this world is full of very sad hateful people who use social media to ease their own pain. I am from your world, Judge Judy, and just cannot comprehend how it has changed for the worse in many aspects.
  36. Social Media

    by Joyce If you liken social media to television of its day, it can be a great tool. Information is at your fingers in an instant, the bad part is that the information may be false and misleading. Like all things we must take everything with a grain of salt. What I love about social media is that I can interact with like minded people around the country and the globe. I also can Skype with my grandson who is in another state. What I don't like about it is that it's difficult to interact with a person who chatting on a cell phone, or a young person who is playing a game on an I pad. I remember going out to dinner with my daughter and her husband, and a family at the table next to us sat down. They had 2 young boys not yet 8 with them, both were playing games on their I pads. They never interacted with themselves, or anyone else. When the waitress came to take their order the 2 boys never looked up to acknowledge the waitress. We disconnect ourselves from the human race and that's sad.
  37. Social or impersonal.

    by Rose Lynn I play on the computer. I still, write real letters, make phone calls. A lot of people laugh and tease me a little. Claiming I need to embrace the tweets, I.M's e-mails. Nothing can really replace a cup of coffee, and a phone call with a good friend, or family member. My mom saved cards, letters, and so on from all of her kids, as well as friends. Will this be around 60+ years from now? No, it is a hello, and good by to most people! On the plus side, it enables us to feel like we are connecting with our world, and social circles "we" would normally not have opportunity to! Example: Hello, and best regards to you Judy! Keep on being you! I would rather be able to say hello in person! That is not always possible!
  38. Instant Gratification

    by Melissa Judge Judy, I learned to type on a manual typewriter. I am still learning when it comes to social media. I have a twitter account and have never tweeted. I do enjoy seeing pictures of friends and family that I rarely get to see in person, so for that I think facebook, instagram, and other social outlets are for the better. Let's face it. We are all BUSY! I am guilty of not phoning folks as often as I should. I do LOVE the ability to send a quick text. if the person is busy, they can respond at any time. I do think that we should remember that these conveniences should not replace face to face or phone calls. I become bombarded with information that is so quickly available, but I am glad it is there!
  39. Dummy

    by Juli In my opinion, the whole internet phone social media is dumbing down the world. It feeds people's ego and makes them think they are more important than they are. It creates an addiction. It desensitizes us. It destroys our sense of patience. It tempts people to do things that they normally wouldn't do. Nevermind the radiation it puts out. Whatever happened to the red phone with the swirley cord that was attached to the wall in the kitchen ? We need to bring it back.
  40. Social Media

    by Christina There are many good things about social media however it is destroying personal connections. I miss getting phone calls and letters. That personal touch. It is so sad to see everyone constantly on their IPhones. Even my own son who serves in the Army is never without his phone in his hand when he visits me. Makes me crazy. I feel its like an addiction. At work break time used to be fun sitting with co workers and chatting. Now I walk in the break room and everyone is starring down at their phones, no conversation. It's very sad.
  41. social media

    by Sue I am 60 and yes into social media to the degree of a 60-year-old, for example, I need a very young person to show me how to use the smart phone, my voice mail was in Spanish and I don't speak nor read it. I could not change it after weeks of trying, gave it to a 25 year old ..done in 2 seconds..arghhhhhhh. Social media is good and bad.. good because of speed. Bad because it's out there and can be used against you..especially if you have had a couple of bottles of wine..(but in court it was only 2 glasses) (guilty) and more so if you have no filter like myself, I was brought up the same way, speak your mind, debate stuff, but that was the UK. I speak my mind here. I am lampooned, big social difference between us. I am actually called Judge Judy at my workplace because I say what I believe is the right thing to say and took a social media test where they evaluate what your job should be by your answers..guess what my job should be? Yes you guessed it..a pig farmer..lol .no a judge
  42. My view of your question on Technology

    by Evelyn Hello Judy, I believe that due to all the technology out there today, we have lost that personal touch that real caring feeling. Nothing like a hand written note a voice on the phone. By the way Judy you are the best and I want you to know that I won't miss your show for anything. Fondly, Evelyn 
  43. Humanity

    by Cindy I don't know Judge. Seems that social media has changed the way in which we communicate with one another. It's a matter of taste. My relative is 80+ and still writes letters to her grandchildren. She also text and uses her email. She wants to stay connected while still keeping some of her values. On the other hand Judge, we have our first black president and our society is more diversified. Long way from hoods, lynching, dogs and hoses. Now was THAT human?
  44. Technology and Connection

    by Jokie Dear Judge Judy-- I think that, like any tool, communication technology is only as useful (for connection) as it is made to be. One shouldn't try to do the work of a hammer with a screw driver and vice versa. When I or my friends plan events, we do Facebook invites. When it does not work, it is because it is used as a sort of farce. When it does, a map to the location can be easily attached. Also, as I have done myself, a Google Street View photo can help visual thinkers. Guests can ask questions, make suggestions, answer questions, and everyone will have access to the discussion. Facebook messaging has allowed me and my shipmates, from an upcoming cruise, to plan how we will meet and find one another on the ship after boarding. I can email my bank or check my account or the cruise ship web site as needed, freeing up time. As long as the technology is used to *encourage* personal connection, it can do so. Take care--- Jokie, San Francisco
  45. Recent move

    by Doug Having moved my family for economic reasons to a different part of the country made me glad it is 2014 not 1995. I say this because despite not being physically close to a person or group I can at any point in the day (even while working) share a thought, say hello or even recycle a private joke. So while it may be different, one could make an argument that we are even closer than if I were to live 15 minutes away (which is no longer the case).
  46. Change for the better?

    by Rich Electronic social media is still very young and will keep evolving to fit our needs as humans. New forms of communication have usually met some skepticism until the benefits are better understood. Some ancient philosophers believed that carving out words on stone tablets would hinder people from orally communicating with each other and would lead to a "dumbing down" of society. Some people believe the same about today's social media, that it places a facade on our social interactions and creates superficial relationships. Perhaps we are minimizing our sense of empathy and compassion by limiting our personal communications, or maybe we're enhancing it by sending the mundane details of our lives into cyber space so we can focus on the genuine details of our relationships. Besides, knowing that there is a slight chance that Judge Judy is reading about my thoughts is enough for me to give two thumbs up to social media.
  47. The new normal

    by Abby This is a good question, Your honor. For better or worse, e-communication is the new normal. Before telephones, how did people interact with each other? They knocked on each other's door and invited them for dinner. I'm sure when the telephone became the new normal, those folks who preceded it pined about how we might lose that personal touch by not knocking on each other's door. The world changes and we adapt. So, my feeling is that it is no different to send someone an email and express a true human emotion than it is to call them. No matter the method of contact, you are still reaching out to tell someone that they are on your mind.
  48. The Great Illusion

    by JB Judy, As a "young person", I find it frustrating to, by default, by mere accident of generation--of age, of decade of birth, of society and culture of upbringing--to be associated with so many others that were essentially raised on electronics. I was not, personally, but there lies my frustration; though I am of the digital age, my mental age, my maturity, my social acuity, does not at all seem that befitting someone of my actual age in years. I agree that social media is a double-edged sword, and unfortunately, it seems to be one that continually pierces me, no matter how strongly I try to go against its grain. Much younger than yourself, I actually, as you state, prefer face-to-face interaction, picking up a phone--not using one to write-out my thoughts--but this preference for genuine socializing now has the alienating effect of making one an outsider if they do not give-in to social media. So that--this great illusion of "contact"--is my beef with it all.
  49. reaching out

    by lindamay I am profound hearing impaired, so I use caption telephone but hate using it due to the delay. My children get mad with me because they think I am not listening to what they are saying to me so I don't speak with them on the phone. I email when I have to speak with them;at least I have that technology. That is my story!
  50. Double-edged Sword

    by Judy H. I agree with you Judge Judy. Social media has taken the place of many different types of real human interaction. I think that social media outlets like Facebook, Twitter, e-mail, etc. can too easily become a crutch for some. It really is nothing more than a series of one way dialogues cleverly disguised to appear like a real conversation. A real conversation is a face to face interaction of two or more human beings that involve give and take. It is a skill and an art form. One has to learn to speak clearly and concisely to convey one's thoughts, and then the other person needs to learn to listen (not just hear) and process what is being said. Young people, and even some older ones, are losing the ability to carry on even the simplest of conversations without peppering their sentences with words such as: "like", "uh", and "you know". Sad.
  51. Not my bag

    by mm I have always believed in "reaching out and touching someone". If I want to connect with a friend or more so family, I make a phone call. I will write a note if it requires my words in my writing. Do I use email? Yes, but not to connect with someone. Someone's voice is their heart that I hear and that doesn't work in a text or email. Do I have all the technology and the ability to use it, yes. However, I choose not to with those that are important to me. When I hear someone say they have 50 - 100 so called friends I feel for them. That to me is similar to enjoying an author and loving their books. They aren't nor will ever be my friends. And I am happy.
  52. Social Media: What's Missing

    by David Social Media is great for communicating with people easily. However, what gets lost is tone of voice and facial/body language. I nearly lost my current girlfriend because tone was not conveyed over messaging. We now have an agreement to call if anything seems to be said the wrong way.
  53. The Age of Intolerance

    by Chrystal I think that people are using social media and other forms of communications as a means of having more control over who they have that face to face contact with and who they keep out there on a leash. Today's young adults and teens are not being taught how to tolerate "all" people, as I was when I was growing up. Like my Grandma's family. She had 8 brothers & sisters. They grew up in a time of driving to each others house to visit and in the time of family reunions. My Grandma passed away in 1998 and I haven't been to a family reunion since. I didn't 'like' everyone on her side of the family, but I was taught how to tolerate them when they visited & I minded my manners. Nowadays, people will email, text, or let family & friends view their social media and think that is considered as being connected to your family. Until you have that family reunion, you are not truly connected. You need to shake hands and give hugs and see people eye to eye. Then you can say you are connected.
  54. Two-Edged Sword.

    by Garth Humans are social creatures. Social media capitalizes on this fact. The internet enables all kinds of interactions that weren't available before. But with this new capability comes both good and bad extremes. The human experience is laid bare like never before and while many enjoy the benefits, others pay a heavy price. Cyber-stalking and cyber-bullying coexist alongside wikileaks and kickstarter. When I first started reconnecting with old friends on the internet, I thought it was great. And for awhile it was. But after saying hello and catching up, I soon found that many old friends had changed and moved on with their lives. Things just weren't the same as before. Certain friendships, I realized were fruitful and rewarding only in the context of the past. There's an old saying that warns 'You can never go home again'. The truth of these words held new meaning as I watched exciting reconnections disconnect just as fast. I guess the more things change, the more they stay the same.
  55. Impatience and detachment

    by Marty I agree that technology is a good thing in many respects but what is happening is that people get impatient if they do not have an answer to an inquiry in seconds. I started working in the travel industry in 1975, to book an international hotel it would take one to two weeks to get a reply, we hand wrote all of the airline tickets and made arrangements with the client sitting across from us. It was personal. Today, you can book an entire itinerary in just minutes but the personal touch is gone. There is a certain detachment when there is no actual interaction with people and sadly it is abundantly clear in the way folks relate to one another these days. People are bumping into each other on the streets because they cannot take their eyes off their phones. It's too much.
  56. Good and Bad Experience

    by Dee W Social Media can be good and bad. Its good because we can connect with family members or friends. We use our cell phones when we are in an emergency-like you have a flat tire etc and you call for help. BUT IT CAN BE BAD! People depend TOO MUCH on email and texting rather than pick up a phone, dialing the number and talking to A PERSON. You will get your answer a lot faster. At work, we had a client that took to social media and posted a nasty review about our company stating they never heard from us and not to do business with us! We did an investigation and discovered we had emailed him 4 times and called him 3 times(leaving messages) and no response. We called him and discovered all of the emails sent were in his spam folder! He apologized but did not take down the nasty review!! HEY PEOPLE PICK UP A PHONE SOMETIMES ITS NICE TO TALK TO A PERSON!!! YOU WILL GET YOUR ANSWER ALOT FASTER!!!
  57. Man/Woman & machine

    by Carol My thoughts on social media are mixed. I was raised like you Judy to call someone or send out invitations with an RSVP to gather. Social media to me is a good place for connecting with a lot of people you may have lost contact with over the years, whether it be phone # or address change. Let me give you an example. I have a very close friend I've know since 1984 & she had told me she had to sell her house. I asked her to please not forget to call & give me her new #. Well now the # is out of service, the E-mail is no longer valid. The only thing I can think of is to call her husband at his work. I always believe in having a paper backup of all phone #'s & addresses as not everyone is attached to their computers. My Mom used to call me to come fix the time on her VCR when daylight savings would occur. I have mixed feelings & have always been a bit computer illiterate but that's okay I'm not the only one. Carol Garnett
  58. Humanity will always shine through ....

    by Isobel Technology is a wonderful thing ... look - here I am sitting in the deepest countryside of Lincolnshire in the UK 'talking' to friends I have never seen on the other side of the world! And without the problems of accents! Technology will be abused by the young and foolish and the naive and the illiterate and the unimaginative .. but for others it is a means to an end that allows us the time we hunger for to reach out to the important people in our lives. I would rather hear from a friend via email than not hear from them at all ... and that initial email will no doubt lead to telephone calls/Skype messaging or one of the many other forms of communication that technology has made so available. Does that make us less human? I think not. I think that makes us fortunate. It is NOT how we make contact .. it is that we DO make contact. That we communicate. That is the essence of humanity.
  59. What's the emergency?!

    by Cynthia Yes we have Lost our connections. Breaks my heart to see many people and 99% of young ones hooked up to various devises, with mechanisms in their hands, can no longer think or be creative or be silent . Always attached to some programmed game or video,or texing. Absorbed in What? Just stuff. Bombarded with Gotta See... Gotta Do..... gotta Go... gotta Know....., our heads full of Noise. People on phones,talking loud. Can it no longer Wait 'tll we are home. What's the emergency? Call me on the phone...write me a card or a note, hug me in person. This social media has it's Place, and it definitely needs to be Kept there!
  60. For Better or Worse

    by Deborah Yes we are all losing a part of our self. I don't care for all the new high tech out there. God only knows what someone can do with it at some point in time. We are all just a number now and I think the worse is yet to come.
  61. Cell phones/e-mails

    by Sandy I'm not a spring chicken either but what I like about sending messages via text or e-mail is that I can contact people and not get them in trouble at work or take a chance on calling them while they are driving. I hate that people are so distracted when I do see them in person that it makes me feel unimportant. I am very conscientious about shutting off my phone in a lot of situations. There is nothing like hearing a loved one's voice or seeing them in person to really connect. There are facial expressions and tones of voice that you just miss in the printed word. I do think our humanity is being compromised by it all.
  62. Long Reigns the Tweet

    by Barbara Perhaps it is only my imagination, but I feel that while social media consumption is certainly rising and will for ever more, people are also becoming more aware of its negative effects. Yes the young overuse it -- every generation becomes obsessed with the latest thing. I believe that the society-wide social media addiction while soon taper off into a common attitude of moderation.
  63. Me telephone 'friends'

    by Steven Yes, Judy, sometimes, in a way, we have lost the personal touch. However, now that social media has become more advanced than when it first came out, we can easily 'personalize' our emails with emoticons, sound bites, etc. So, sometimes it can be a little more interesting to communicate rather than to just say, "Hello, how are you?" Also, I found something else out. I used to have 'friends' who would call me on the phone just to make me hear their voice. It was difficult for me to be forthright enough to let them know I really wasn't appreciative of the way people tended to always rely on me. You know, asking for advice, or telling me what books to read, what shows to watch. Social media has allowed me to become more selective with whom I associate. Now, if I don't want to hear about it anymore, for instance, I can simply change my email address, and enjoy the solitude! Conceited? Not really, just managing my lifestyle more efficiently. Plus I love sending email cards.
  64. Social Media

    by Terry Getting a text for my Birthday instead of a phone call is not as satisfying. There's something about a persons voice that makes us feel more connected. It's a proven fact we need human contact. When babies can recognize parents voices in the womb what makes us think that need of sound disappears with age? It's both a curse and a gift. Moderation and common sense is key. A good old fashion phone call,letter or personal visit is best but, if used sparingly social media is nice.
  65. Harder to Understand With No Voice

    by Stacey I always think of numerous times when sending an email or a text message has ended up causing a lot of trouble in my life. These types of social media are great when you need to reach someone quickly, but I feel that when you can't hear the voice of the person you are receiving a message from, one single sentence has a thousand different meanings and interpretations. I think of the time when my friend decided to save money and sent out her wedding invitations via email. I didn't notice it because, well it went to my spam folder and I almost ended up missing her wedding. It was only because she texted me and asked me if I was planning on attending. Really? So here I feel dumb because I almost missed one of the most important days in my friend's life because she sent her invites via email. And when I received the text, it wasn't exactly written very nicely...or at least that's how I took it. So social media didn't make life easy in this case.
  66. It's what you make of it!

    by Craig My parents had their type of social media called a phone and paper and pen. 18 years ago my wife didn't think it was necessary for us to have a computer, I told her we would use it to comunicate with my deaf son in school. Two years ago my wife retired, and she is on her smart phone, I-PAD & computer playing games all day long. On Facebook for hours. Hardly ever uses her phone for talking to people. Very seldom ever goes outside the house. I retired 12 years ago. 90% of my time on my computer, smart phone & I-PAD is for volunteer work, letter writing, e-mailing people to speak in my classes at a local prison. Facebook to comunicate with Christian Biker friends. I am on the go constantly, and interact with people all day long. My mother is 91, and uses her computer to comunicate with family & friends. And, communicating with her "friend" back east. Yes, for some people social media devices can actually isolate them from society. These devices are just a fact of life now.
  67. Media-ocracy

    by Jennifer I use e-mail. I signed up on Facebook, and Twitter and ended by deleting FB and Twitter. I simply could not take the overwhelming Tsunami of banality. I pick up the phone, I write thank you notes and letters of condolence. I contact businesses with handwritten letters. Notes, cards to neighbours left at their doors, have written in the left hand corner of the envelope, BY HAND. Because my mother taught me to do it. She was a lady of the South. I am a somewhat private person and I simply can't wrap my head around revealing every aspect of your life to the entire world. Why? Has modesty become outmoded? We are social animals; but that shouldn't preclude a human touch, whether personally or the scratch of a pen to paper. Sincerely, Jennifer
  68. Staying Connected

    by Sylvia I think social media has allowed us to be more connected. I live on the east coast my grandchildren on the west. Due to many reasons, mostly financial, I don't get to see them often. But with my computer I have been able to watch one of them star in a play and one of them in a cheerleading competition live. A young friend is getting married soon in a small wedding. I will get to be there because it will be live fed and I can sign on to my computer and watch it as it happens. I am in touch with many people from my past that I might never have heard from again and we can share life stories, grandchild pictures and memories together even if we never get to be face to face again. We can empathize and congratulate with one another almost instantly. I can complain or give an 'attaboy' to stores or others as soon as the issue arises and usually get good responses. I love the social media. Without it I would be a very lonely old woman.
  69. Be discriminatory!

    by Laura As a college professor reaching back to the 70's I grew up with the computer and later the internet. It can be a boon or a bust. Many put trivial pictures and events on Facebook or YouTube, pictures of their food, or people I do not know. I have no time for that. But to be able to write a story, thoughts and ideas and send them to those whom I know would appreciate them in such a short time can be very valuable. My writing has improved, and I am able to cultivate friends who I deeply respect. I was never good at the typewrite but on the computer I can find ways to be more expressive, find works, check facts, research history. It works for those who are mature enough to handle it. But it can resort to trivial information that does not bring people together. I congratulate you for being open to it rather than reject it outright. Can you imagine getting emails from some of the people who have appeared before you in court? Dr.Laura
  70. Losing humanity due to social technology/media

    by Colleen Yes I agree we have lost some humanity by using those items rather than calling or visiting. We need human companionship and the human touch, holding a hand, hugging and really talking & letting people know we really care. It would be so sad if we hadn't been doing that and then got a call or found out that loved one had passed away! I would be so crushed that I had not taken the time out to go see someone, like my parents. I always tell my family: always tell someone whom you love that you LOVE them and how much you appreciate them because you never know when you may not ever see them again :( Share fun times from before, laugh at yourself laugh with them. Help them when you can, be there when they are sick. This coming from a hypocrite as I rarely see my parents yet they are only 1.5hrs away. I am very depressed and not in a happy marriage, due to my own doing, unfortunately. Plus having a somewhat controlling husband doesn't help. Make our speech mean something by our actions.
  71. Future generations missing out!

    by Diane I totally think our future generations are missing out on what we grew up with. Less human interaction and people forget or don't have social graces any longer because they aren't taught and don't practice. Manners you say....they don't learn those either anymore. Ex: When was the last time you received a "thank you" note from some occasion like a wedding or shower etc. I bet you had to think about it for a while. Convenience is one thing but some things are lost on a text. Emily Post or an etiquette book for today's technology would be a best seller.
  72. Level the Communication Plane!

    by C Higdon I have found, in relation to your communication video, that a voice on the other end of the phone is so much more pleasant. We are loosing our personal touch in this high tech society if all we do is email and text. I believe that the tech way is faster and is alright if both parties do not have the time. However, we should try to level the communication plane. We should use both ways to communicate with our friends and loved ones. Always remembering that voices do need to be heard, literally.
  73. connecting with friends

    by Joan I use email to send photos to family and friends and to let people in on really funny jokes and cartoons (not everything I get - just the really good ones). Still call and visit friends and let them know I really value them. There are good and bad things about the internet, but it can be used carefully and thoughtfully to keep friendships - even far away ones - intact.
  74. Disconnected!

    by constance Not so much a story but a feeling of being disconnected from whomever I am messaging or replying to. It loses so much humanity as you so eloquently put it... I don't care for it.. but it is now an accepted way of communicating.. unfortunately..

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